What is the best soup you ever had?
On dealing with the impact of an electing and a gloomy weekend. How the best home made soup turned my gloominess into a shining one filled with memories and comfort.
The weekend promised to be pretty cloudy and gloomy. As I was going to be home mostly by myself, I had all the freedom to choose what to eat, without taking into account what my dearest likes! Ha!
I was lying on the couch and out of the blue I heard my voice break the silence: ‘bruine bonensoep.’ A traditional Dutch, richly filled winter soup that translates as ‘brown bean soup.’ Interestingly I never made that soup before and had only eaten it in canned versions. Until now.
Why my sudden crave to eat bruine bonensoep?
At that moment I didn't know why. It was not even my favorite soup. But the memory of the taste made me want to eat it even more. Was it the taste itself I craved for. Like when you have not eaten French fries for a long time? Or perhaps something more? Soon I would find out.
As this soup contains meat I had to find a vegetarian version. If my physiotherapist would allow me to jump, I would have jumped out of happiness when I found an easy to make recipe.
‘But we don’t have brown beans in Finland’ was my partner's first response when I told her about my cooking plans. Surprised, I looked at her and murmured something like:
‘I cannot believe that.’ She was right. Fortunately Lidl came to my rescue and I managed to buy two boxes that contained a mix of red and white beans.
‘That should do it!’ I thought.
Saturday afternoon, I put on Ane Brun and whispered: ‘ Let the vegetable chopping begin!’ On the slow rhythm of The Opening I chopped carrots, potatoes, onions, garlic and leek. The beans I rinsed.
When there's so much darkness closing in just swerve around slowly you'll find an opening . A light will appear like an animal between the trees . There you'll find your pocket of peace
Was it these soothing words from the song, or the familiar smell that soon filled the kitchen, that made my thoughts wonder away? I do not know.
I found myself sitting again in that small kitchen on the tenth floor of a student flat. It had a table with four chairs and a fridge. After a long day we sat there talking and laughing while waiting for the frozen pizza to defrost in an old electrical oven. Or on other days we would franticly search for the can opener, so we could open the large can filled with.., yes, bruine bonensoep.
Maybe that is why I longed to eat this simple student time soup on this gloomy weekend. Life seemed to be then so much less complicated. Of course it was not. What we did have was our curious notion on life. Somehow over our working years we seemed to have lose that.
Now we find ourselves living in a world in a grip of wars and a newly chosen president of the United States. And like many, I also struggle. Because I do not know. I do not know the answer to what´s next. Then I read what American writer Anne Lamott posted on her Facebook, after the election results:
´When you are asked to answer a hard question or challenge saying: ‘ I do not know´ opens up possibilities. This gives us a shot of being curious, rather than being certain. Which is a dead end. How do we keep the faith in goodness? I do not know. We just do.´
So, with courage I say from the bottom of my heart `I do not know!´
In the meantime I go for a walk so I can come home all chilled through the bone. The best way to warm up is over a steaming hot plate of home made bruine bonensoep. Tomorrow is another day.